Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Week Two: I Love Dark Ya-Flash Fiction


This week our hosts at YAtopia wants us to write a 500 word or less flash fiction story about the picture below. This picture didn't inspire me at all. Like zero and zilch. I knew if I was to complete this weeks post for the bloghop, I was going to have to reach down deep to my muse to get creative.


So I flipped her over and walla! Some inspiration. My story came in at 363 words.


Control
The girl dangled upside down from the tree holding her hands to her face crying. She had walked right into the hunters trap. He ensnared her fast and his ego swelled. Her ankle was red from being bound in the thick rope, but he only cared about winning.
He hid behind a tree with a satisfied smirk on his face. The fog rolled in off the river cloaking the girl like a blanket, but she wasn’t safe—not even close.  He had watched and waited, isolating her from family and friends. He followed her every move like a lion seeking its prey. He would own her.
Even when he was hunting her the girl looked over her shoulder smothered by his presence. He liked that it drained her energy, threatening to take all her life giving air, and suffocating her until she felt defeated. It’s how he captured her to begin with.
He would have his way. The girl would comply because he would cling to her like morning dew affixes to a blade of grass. He came out from behind the tree making his presence known. It would always be known from here on out.
The girl struggled. Her eyes were puffy and red. Her hair hung like a curtain of silk, but she was still pretty. His mouth quirked up and his chest puffed out as he walked toward the girl with a silver blade.
The blade sliced through the rope with a single swipe and the girl fell to the ground. Her crying turned to loud sobbing. She rubbed at her ankle, but he pulled at her arm until she stood.
And then the crying stopped.
White light flashed around her. Her frown became a wide smile. Her shoulders pulled backwards until her back was straight. She now stood taller than the hunter. The hunter’s eyes widened.
“You will only make me feel inferior if I allow it and news flash, I won’t allow it!”
The girl walked away limping leaving the hunter sitting on the ground crying, wallowing in his self- pity and doubt.
The girl prayed for the hunter before the ground opened up and swallowed him whole.
For more flash fiction stories visit YAtopia for a list of participants.

9 comments:

Becky Mahoney said...

Flipping it upside-down was a great idea! I love all of this, but especially the last line.

Theresa said...

I love how you flipped it. It wasn't working for you and you made it work. That's awesome. What I loved most about the story was that you made the girl strong and powerful. The line: "You will only make me feel inferior if I allow it and news flash, I won’t allow it!” had me doing a little fist pump.

Emily R. King said...

Flipping the picture upside down was a stroke of genius. Also, the ending flipping on the bad guy was a nice touch.

Anonymous said...

Brilliant idea to turn the photo upside down!

Brinda said...

I love surprise endings. Great job with the flipped photo!

S. L. Hennessy said...

What a great idea! Flipping it over - awesome. Great piece!
- http://pensuasion.blogspot.com/

M.J. Fifield said...

Flipping the photo was a great idea. The last line is terrific!

Anonymous said...

Like others have said--great idea to flip the picture to inspire yourself! Great job!

Claire Hennessy said...

Hey well done. Just flipping the picture was clever, let alone the rest - I, too, thought you wrote a fab last line and that is so important.